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wBeverly's Journal |
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This is my Journal. If you stop by, leave a comment. Thanks!
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wApril 13, 2002 |
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You know what I forgot to do? Name all the rest of the people I met on my trip to Berkeley. I met soo many people! Okay... here's the grand list of names and something I know about each (mainly so I won't forget): Sophia, we sat on the plane together, we toured the airport together, I kinda had her ID the entire trip... oops!; Ellie, we met late in the boarding process en route to Oakland, we sat together on the way back, and we stared in amazement at the rate of change for the inflation of her bag of Korean rice snacks; Yi, we waited in the security line together, his camera had to be checked, he had a funny tag thing sticking out of the top of his Cal hat (and he couldn't remove it!!! haha!); Daniel, he is really tall and funny, he had a science project paper that was due by 5 pm on our return date... they frantically searched the airport for a fax machine; Winnie, quiet, and I mixed her up with Wendy... hey, they sound the same!!!; Wendy, looks like Chia! She was studying Econ when I got there... she was a victim to Andrew's meanness (why is he being so mean? I may have to unask him to Prom... even yesterday when I IMed him, he was mean... grrr...); Simon and Mindy, we met on the last day at the Pizza place... I have a picture of them there, they were overlooked when the lady in charge was looking for people to check in; Michael, from the Burbank flight, had to get his shoes checked at the security station, really nice guy; Maryam, really talkative, says out-of-character lines every now and then, knows a girl staying in Foothill, a nice person, but weird sometimes (so, she'll fit into Berkeley just perfectly!); and there are probably more that I met... but I'm too tired to think of more right now. I'm going to do something else other than wander aimlessly online.
posted by
Beverly at 11:12 AM
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Let me add really quickly that my craps-dealing job paid $40 a night for about two hours of work! So, why is the James Event Productions paying hardly anything?!?! Grrr...
posted by
Beverly at 10:56 AM
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Since I know you read this Kunal... Beazer.com? That's it... you're banned from using my computer... teehee. j/k. :) You're a crack up! And if you ever trust me enough to let me use your computer, you can bet that it'll come up on some curlew.com or something. haha!
I'm tired. I did get ten hours of sleep last night, but I'm still tired! Yesterday, I went to a job interview for James Productions. According to my ROP teacher, it was supposed to have been a good, nice place to staff games and rides and the like (so I could work with children, etc.)... and there was another job that Ms. Jelin said was open: Mistress of Ceremonies. I immediately jumped on the emcee job. Wouldn't it be fun to emcee parties?! I figured that my experience in speech-giving would give me a heads up on the job... but NOOO... they weren't even hiring emcees. Grrr... ;( Well... I interviewed for the job they were hiring for (general picnic staffer)... and what am I supposed to do? Set up chairs and tables and stuff... like easy work! For me, it's not about the money (which is only 6.75 or 6.95 an hour to start)... I don't care if they pay me nothing... it's the line of work that bothers me... I wrote about this earlier, and I wrote about it in my "what I've learned"... I don't like doing things that anyone else can do... these girls that interviewed with me had done about NOTHING in their schools. No qualifications whatsoever... and I come in with my resumée and I come in dressed professionally. And we get hired for the same job?!? It makes my work seem pointless... why?! I don't want a regular job! I want something that no one else can do!!! (I think I'm going to end my relationship with James Productions and take a job working with kids with Anaheim Achieves or something). That's about it for now.
posted by
Beverly at 10:54 AM
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wApril 11, 2002 |
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Let me write about what I did yesterday. I went to to the Prinicpals' Meeting at 7:15 am at the District. They're already trying to replace me!!! :(
I then went back to school to find that everyone from IB was off to a field trip. So, there were about ten or so of us left in TOK. We played this cool game in history (On a Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday night; So beware of the snare of the Rikki Tikki Bear cub... I don't remember the rest). I left at 11 to go to LAX. I met a bunch of nice people. I hung out with a bunch of people from LA. (Winnie, Wendy, Sophia, Eileen, Yi, Daniel, and Asif) Did I forget anyone?! Well, after Sophia and I took a tour of the place, we went back. A couple minutes later... guess who shows up? Andrew! And I thought I wouldn't know anyone else! Hah!
I will have to say, Southwest is interesting. No assigned seating. No first class. Let me give you a little bit of advice: NEVER sit facing backward in a plane (the first row). Yes, more leg room, but you are totally thrown forward at takeoff, there's no recline, and there's no tray table! We (Andrew, Sophia, and I) met this cool business guy on the plane. We talked about everything from college to gameshows! It was so fun!
When we arrived at Oakland airport, we took a charter bus to Berkeley. They gave us pizza, but we passed on it to go to the cafeteria. My Overnight Host is Tamieka. She's really nice (and apparently really smart! She entered this year as a Junior, straight from high school! It's a long story... I'll tell you later). We spent yesterday touring the dorms/on campus housing/frat and sorority houses. We went to the Moffit Library, and we saw pretty much all of campus at night. Let me tell you this, if you want to stay in a NICE dorm type area... there's this community called FOOTHILL. It's so awesome! Also, I like the Beverly Cleary complex Unit 3. It's pretty nice. There's an Asian theme program there on the third floor. (You have more of a chance finding a place to stay past your freshman year if you go into a theme program). Berkeley is pretty nice, though I'll have to say that Telegraph is pretty interesting. The bums there have the funniest stories to tell when they beg for money! Well, I'm off to meet Suraj! :)
Hope you all are having fun at school, while I'm here at Berkeley! (the most awesome part about this trip, BTW, is that there is no itenerary... we just hang out with our Hosts for the two days! So, if they go to class, we go to class, if they go to a club meeting, we go to a club meeting... how cool is that?!
posted by
Beverly at 8:58 AM
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I think I shall write about last night.
Keep in mind that when I say "last night," I really mean two nights ago because I didn't get a chance to send this before I went off to Berkeley (which is where I am right now!)
A few days ago, I was quite enraged about the Regents/Chancellors Scholarship thing at Berkeley. It was a sort of, "She got it and I didn't?" So... I went to the Regents and Chancellors Scholars Association page, where I discovered a registration form for the Overnight Host Program. I took the opportunity to fill it out. Hey, what have I got to lose? They can't turn me down because I was never accepted in the first place! Well, I wrote to the program directors about the unfairness of the selection of the Regents Scholars. I also requested that they interview me anyway. I didn't expect to hear anything back from them. I just needed to let them know that there are people out there that feel that way. I am probably not the only one.
The Regents Scholarship, if you don't know, is given to the top 200 or so students at each UC. In March, they interview 1000 potential Scholars. The Scholarship may provide up to full tuition for a RC Scholar. The way they select the top 1000? By using the formula of GPA and SATs, and basically a bunch of numbers.
Back to the story. Last night at about 10:30 pm, I got a call from Matt Spencer, one of the VPs for the RCSA. Wow, there really are people reading those things! He told me that I had "a lot of spunk" for even sending that registration complaint in the first place. He told me that I should have probably been one of the top 1000 to be interviewed, but that, ulitmately, it was not up to the RSCA who is chosen to be interviewed. He then told me that his RCS is only giving him $1000 a year (because he has no finacial need)... which makes me feel a lot better, because that's probably how much I would have gotten (as opposed to full tuition). We talked about many issues concerning college. I even proposed my ideas about going to the most prestitigious colleges for free (by just showing up! It's actually a really good idea, and I would do it if there was no big difference between the piece of paper and no piece of paper). Why not? Just go to classes... If the professors can't tell who's there and who's not, how can they tell if a person is even enrolled in the class or not? Just sit in the back and take notes. Learn. Learning is what it's all about. Then, like Mr. Higger said this morning, start your own business, so the diploma paper is really not an issue. The fact of the matter is that you learned it. If an employer is so blinded by graduates from prestigious colleges (who have degrees) that he won't hire a person who has learned the same amount (but has no diploma because he did not enroll as a student), then I wouldn't want to work for him anyway. A piece of paper doesn't tell you what a person knows. A person can know just as much or even more without the diploma. IN FACT, I would flaunt the fact that I got around the system by getting a $30,000/year education for FREE!!! I do see Matt's point, though, that employers may want someone of that intellect, but would fear that person cheating the system at work. Cleverness never got anyone far in the social world; people hate and despise the clever.
So, I didn't get the interview, but I did get to talk to a Berkeley student (for an hour!) about my views on some of the hot topics in my mind right now (namely, that the SATs and selection for colleges/scholarships like the RCS are unfair, and that college should be about learning and not about the grade). I spent at least a full 15 minutes berating him for caring so much about the grade and the diploma and not about the education/learning. I'm not sure if I heard him correct, but after talking with me, he almost advocated my going to Reed instead of Berkeley. (Maybe it's just because he'd rather not bump into me at Berkeley.)
posted by
Beverly at 8:44 AM
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wApril 07, 2002 |
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Does anyone else ever feel really under appreciated? Or perhaps that people are only acting friendly toward you when you are around? I just got back from this giant Girl Scout weekend (where, by the way, it rained again!... three years of Jr. Jam, and it has rained every single time I have gone!). I spent a month at prop paintings, painting everything from a jail to a general store, to a bunch of cacti. I even put my two cents in on some of the other props. One night killed it all. One month, down the drain. Hopefully the pictures will come out well. That's all that's left -- oh yeah, and the "Jail" sign... I saved that. No one cares that I put in that time for all those props. It's just "Oh well, too bad... no more Headquarters." Those were my weekends and my Spring Break I gave up to go to those prop paintings! In the end, I realize that I went to those Prop Paintings because I enjoy painting. I would have gone anyway... but everyone needs some encouragement and some reward... without recognition, I don't feel motivated to do so much work for the same organization again.
You can make any game fun. My game was seeing how long everyone could hold out "YEE HAW!" I hold the record at 47:13 seconds. It's the people that make it fun, not the game itself. Why is the prize, then, for decorations? So what we didn't have cute props. We planned to get the hitchin' post, but that didn't work out. So, we took some rocks. We matched our costumes. We made matching pillow cases! Is that not enough!!!?!? Well, I still think our game is a winner in my eyes. Just seeing the kids get really into it... it's a reward in itself more lasting than any material prize.
About the belonging... I don't belong in Girl Scouts. No one there likes me. They just think I'm "the girl who walked in last year and somehow made it to the top of the food chain." I can't laugh at the same inside jokes, and I can't squeeze myself into already-made friendships that have lasted 9+ years. It's really depressing because I thought up until this year that GS was going great. I guess it started when no one showed up to see me get the VFW Girl Scout of the Year award. Then, at Jr. Jam, I could just tell that there was some kind of resentment from the other girls in the troop. I have a lot of fun doing the behind the scenes work (painting and planning), but when it comes down to it, I can't fit in socially with the rest of the girls. Even now, I feel that Stephanie doesn't really want me in the troop. I've kinda stolen her spotlight as a "leader" in the troop. She wants me to disappear so she can be the favorite again. Not that I care whether I'm the favorite or not. I feel like handing her the VFW trophy just so she'll get off my back. (she went to a bball game instead of the VFW dinner that night... betcha it would have been different if she had gotten the award -- and I would have gone to support her.) [by the way, Steph, if you are reading this, read it all you want... I'm not about to lie to myself and put on a show like I don't feel these things... and to Ashley, this is what I was thinking about this morning when I was staring into space]. Here's another thing that happened last night: I was saything something about the subject we were talking, and Liz was looking right at me, but she wasn't paying attention. She completely blew me off like I wasn't important. She probably thinks I'm taking her spotlight too... she's the "Advisory member on the Girl Scout council"... Yes, and I'm the Student Member on the Board of Trustees for the AUHSD... so what's your point? Stop bragging about your title... we know already.
I can see that Girl Scouts is one thing: an escape. After getting all those letters, I could go to Scouts to paint and take my mind off it. I could go to Jr. Jam and take my mind off it. I got back today, and got wait listed by Cornell. Better than the other three, but still a disappointment. If I have nothing else to do, I'll just mope... which isn't healthy. At least GS gets me away from my room and my moping time. Perhaps Scouts is doing more for me than I am doing for it. Or, maybe it is the other way around. Through Scouts, I have met so many people (friendly or not), and I have learned so much about relationships. I can see the cliques form, and I can see myself trying to break them up. I can see even leadership form cliques. I am not a cliquey person. I treat all my friends pretty much equal, and I spend no more time with one friend than I do with another. I'd rather not built one big giant Best Friend relationship because it'll probably end up like my last one (which is really sad, because that was perhaps the longest one of my best friends has ever stayed in Anaheim). Best friends only mean sadder partings. Perhaps I am doing this (writing this entry) to make me feel better. I think it has. After all, Morrie says to release your emotions in order to overcome them. Now that I see my problem, I can fix it. It's as simple as that.
I will start off by writing a book. Entitled "How the World Lived Without Me." And, I will have it published; I am determined to have it published because the world needs to know.
posted by
Beverly at 5:26 PM
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