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wBeverly's Journal |
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This is my Journal. If you stop by, leave a comment. Thanks!
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wDecember 25, 2003 |
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Santa promised to get me Steven for Christmas. He has a hour to make good on his promise.
posted by
Beverly at 11:02 PM
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Merry Christmas everyone! :) I love this season. Family togetherness. We opened presents this morning in front of the tree. We checked our stockings to find stuff from Santa (there was even a coupon for free non-queso quesadillas from Byron). I rolled out the sugar cookie dough and we cut out stars, trees, and snowflakes. I made pancakes for breakfast. Christina and I watched the rest of "Harvey" and then we watched "Pirates of the Carribean" (which Sarah got me for Christmas). I got fuzzy slippers and toe socks from Kididahs and I got the Michael Buble CD from Keith. Lissa got me the new So Co CD! Wahoo! :) Thanks everyone! Back to cooking dinner.
posted by
Beverly at 4:43 PM
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wDecember 24, 2003 |
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My friend's flight to France today was canceled. This person will remain unnamed, in case someone was thinking about doing bad things to his/her house while he/she is gone. That really sucks. Flights are going into France anyway, so why are they canceling _just_ ours from LAX? Bleh. I think they said something about specific threats having to do with LA. Oh well. I hope they get there soon, since they want to be there for Christmas.
So close to Christmas. If anyone wants to see the most spectacular light display one may ever see, call me and I'll take you there -- it's close by Jimmy's house.
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas.
posted by
Beverly at 5:35 PM
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i miss steven. i can't stop thinking about him. it's so bad, i can't even capitalize when typing. every time i think of that time he had that look on his face, my heart aches. i need to do something productive so i'll stop thinking about him. i think i'll paint and bake cookies tomorrow.
posted by
Beverly at 1:17 AM
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wDecember 23, 2003 |
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Today, I bought $75 worth of stuff from Aaron Brothers for my art project. Reed is paying for it. I also ran into Miss Harper at Target. Go figure. I went shopping at the supermarket -- for baking ingredients. My neighbors came over and we made English toffee. Then, Gary and I went to his boss's Christmas party. The food was good, the atmosphere was lovely, the people were nice, and the artwork (Don's artwork) was superb. I especially like the oval one. Maybe I'll buy it for my home one day. Then, after the party, Gary and I went to Downtown Disney to see the new Lord of the Rings movie. What an awesome movie.
posted by
Beverly at 2:11 AM
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wDecember 22, 2003 |
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http://web.reed.edu/.../diversifying/index.html
I didn't think I felt like I didn't belong at Reed, until I realized that the white guys at Reed all want to date white girls. Academically, Reed is great. I go to classes and I learn more than I've ever learned before. I get to participate and ask questions, and I can discuss things with the professors after class at their offices. My professors are active in the community outside class... a few of them taught me how to juggle and one danced with me when I went contra dancing. I go to their houses sometimes for dinners or for coffee. I know the President of the college. It's so small and so great -- but it's not perfect.
Every once in a while, I'll realize that I'm the only Asian Amercian person in the room. In the Class of '07, there are only 27 Asian Americans out of the 350 or so who are enrolled. I can converse with people perfectly fine, and, in fact, I can converse with people a lot easier than a lot of the Caucasians can. ...but where does it fall in the end? I can have a ton of friends, but my male friends will be nothing more than that. I guess that's the price I pay for a good education.
I think about the times Jesse and I would go out to eat or go places... about seeing him and having just that make my day. I can't help but think that it won't ever happen again at Reed; and, if it does, it's probably because the guy is lookin' for something else -- something that he's not going to get from me. So, I thought Reed had accepted me into the culture as if I were not a minority, whereas, in actuality, people treat me differently and think of me differently because I'm Asian American. It's this unspoken discrimination that I despise.
I wish the "Multicultural Resource Center" and the ethnic clubs on campus would disappear. Instead of promoting their cultural diversity and weaning their members off their like-culture supports, these clubs only segregate the colored from the non. The "Asian Student Alliance" doesn't even stand for Asians. I went to a meeting. It is dominated by the Nepali bunch, who are friends among themselves. If that club were to get funding, I'm afraid that my semester Student fees are going to a bunch of friends so they can just hang out. NO. I demand more of my school and its student activities. I didn't "Top 6" the ASA. Why? Because it does nothing for the school. Because it only tells the others that we are different and we only want to hang out with our like-culture crowd. I have had enough of it.
I think about these things, but somehow, it's never enough to make me want to move away. I love Reed too much. They say that once you do your thesis, you'll never hate Reed. You can buy "Love Reed" buttons at the bookstore. I think I love Reed already.
I think, in my situation at least, it's fine. I've blended in with the crowd; I've made friends of all colors (yes, mostly white). I don't feel discriminated against on a daily basis. Perhaps that's just because I do not discriminate. I am friendly to all who are willing to be friendly back. I do have a few "enemies" at Reed. I would rather not talk to certain few, but that is only because I have tried to befriend them and they have refused to acknowledge that we are acquantances. I care not to deal with these people. One of these days, I'll be someone who matters, and I shall teach them a lesson about social skills.
In any case, diversity at Reed doesn't exist. The opening chapter of "To Kill a Mockingbird" by Harper Lee addresses the issue. Scout thought she was white most of her childhood life because she was surrounded by the white folk. If, at Reed, I didn't look at myself in the mirror every morning, I too would think I were white.
posted by
Beverly at 9:59 AM
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wDecember 21, 2003 |
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So, the guys rang my doorbell at 10pm last night. We stayed up and talked until 1:30 or so (an hour and a half past my "curfew") at Kunal's house. I haven't seen everyone in so long -- it's nice to catch up on old times. This morning, I had brunch with Lissa at Mimi's. Wow, their cinnamon raisin french toast was really good! (yes, I'm sure it was cinnamon and not marble. hahah.) I hope Steven calls me.
posted by
Beverly at 12:26 PM
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